What if I fail?

A couple weeks ago somebody asked me why I was broadcasting to everybody that I was trying to qualify for Boston this year.  What if it doesn’t work out?  What if I fail?

I was not at all offended by this question, it is a legitimate one.  Sharing goals  (that you are not even sure you are going to accomplish) with the world is risky.  You run the risk of not being successful and having everyone know you did not make it.  You run the risk of people judging you. You run the risk of not only letting yourself down, but others down.  So why did I decide to make it known to all my friends and loved ones that I was going after this?  Why did I not just keep it to myself and surprise everybody if I made it?  Because as soon as you make a personal goal public, it becomes real.  You become more accountable to work towards it and not mess around.

As many of you know I also am a firm believer in manifestation, and I feel very strongly that if I put something out into the universe, somehow someway it will work out.  This of course does not mean I can just sit on my butt and cross my fingers for a sub 3:35 marathon time this October,  I need to put in the work and I have been.   But so much of the things we want come from having the mental ability to conceive and believe in them. 

A good friend once told me…“every thing you have ever wanted, is on the other side of fear”.  So true.  Taking risks is scary.  Going after your dreams is scary.  What if you fall on your face?  What if you are  not good enough?  All are real possibilities, but are they strong enough to keep you from at least trying?  I hope not.

There will be haters, there will be nay-sayers, that is just life.  But the biggest enemy we all face is our mind.  The people who love and support you will pick you up when you fall, they will tell you to keep going.  You are also guaranteed to inspire others along the way.  If you have never truly pushed yourself past fear and past your comfort zone, you have never realized your full potential.  This of course is not just about running, it is about life.  It is about going after what you want.

I would be lying if I told you I am not terrified.  I would also be lying if I told you I would not be upset if I don’t get the time I need at Chicago.  But I would be more upset and disappointed in myself if I never even gave myself the chance.  It is not a matter if I can do it or not, it is a matter of whether or not I believe I can do it.